For me, the weekend is over at around 3 p.m on Sunday. When I’m eating breakfast, I’m already thinking about lunch or dinner.
When a loved one is visiting, I feel like they’ve already left when it’s the day before their flight. I start missing them even though they’re seated right next to me. I can anticipate the dread.
Before I go on a trip, I’m already thinking about the next three.
You could say that I have a problem with living in the present. Sometimes, I can’t help but check things off my to-do list in my mind. I call it my mental multitasking.
Instead of focusing on staying in the moment, is your mind somewhere else, too? Planning for the next thing you have to do?
I think mental multitasking – and not focusing on the here and now – stems from, at least in part, our productivity-soaked society. It’s all about getting things done – and moving on to the next thing on our to-do lists. We’re sprinting to some unforeseen destination, and we’re too afraid of stopping for a water break. But it’s during these breaks that you can breathe and take in the beauty of the present.
When we’re too future- or to-do list focused, we miss the beauty, the gems, the special moments that make up the memories we’ll savor for the rest of our lives (especially of the people who’re gone). While our minds never stop scheduling us for something, our listening skills lose their sharpness. Our patience gets replaced with restlessness. And we start to take many important things for granted.
Here’s how I’m working on staying in the present, and you can, too:
- Take a few slow, deep breaths. Breathing like this helps calm and slow your body down, so if you’re thinking about what to cross off on your to-do list or dreading the work week, just breathing can bring you back to the moment.
- Close your eyes and repeat to yourself why it’s important to be present. Sure, it’s straightforward but it helps. You might say, “Just enjoy yourself. This is an important moment. There’s nothing you can do about such-and-such, but you can choose to enjoy yourself.”
- Practice yoga. Yoga is a great way to sharpen your in-the-moment skills. Not only is yoga soothing, but it also helps your mind focus on the present, on the poses, on your breathing. It helps you let go of other intrusive thoughts that fight for your attention.
- Take in the person, place and other important things. On Weightless, I’ve written about mindful eating, which basically means paying exclusive attention to what you’re eating, focusing on its appearance, taste, texture, the aromas. When you eat, there are no distractions. No TV. No computer. No talking on your phone. It’s just you and your food. Enjoyed in small and slow bites, instead of scarfed down on the go, fast-food style. You can apply these techniques to living in the moment. In whatever situation you’re in, savor the sights and sounds of your surroundings. When you’re talking to a loved one, truly listen to their words and watch their facial expressions. Ponder what they’re saying. Try not to do anything else in the moment.
- Keep a notepad handy. If a thought keeps interrupting you, just write it down, and say to yourself that you’ll attend to it later. If you find yourself constantly worrying about something, try these practical tips.
Learning to live in the present is a process, so don’t beat yourself up if it becomes tougher than you thought to ditch distractions or to genuinely savor every situation. Just try to enjoy the journey.
How do you live in the moment, without getting distracted? If you are distracted, how do you bring yourself back to the present?
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Could there be a more perfect picture for this post? I need work on “being present.” Thanks for reminding me and thanks for the tips to get there.